Huntley, Delaware
Don Lasker, a sheet metal worker by day, a crier by night. Lasker, 37 has been sad ever since his girlfriend, Farina Watkins decided to leave him.
"She was always yelling at me to stop playing X-Box all night and come to bed. I should have listened to her," solemnly said Lasker as he looked out the window of his trailer.
Since Watkins departure, his problem has spread throughout his home like lice. Lasker has been crying into his pillow, night after night.
"I didn't sign up for this," said Don's pillow. "He bought me at Wal-Mart last year for $4.99. It's bad enough that I have to live in this hovel. It constantly smells like cheddar cheese. There is all kinds things strewn about the place. But the worst thing is that he never spends any time with me. When we do get time together, all he does is come crying to me. Well, I am fucking sick of it!" shouted the pillow.
His mother has advised her son to go seek counseling. Ms. Watkins could not be reached for comment. Lasker was later seen on his couch hugging another pillow.
-Silly's Soft News
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